It’s true! Whatever god you adhere to, your understanding of that God does not exist. There is no big ogre in heaven waiting for the next feeble human to step out of line or to disobey his utterances and to strike them dead. Such a god is dead. He just does not exist. People are like that, but not God.

There is no such god who favors one human being over another. A god who sends his chosen ones to wipe out a neighboring nation or who blesses one side more than another does not exist.

Look at your scriptures, what do they say? God rains on the wicked and the righteous. God is no respecter of persons. All men are equal in God’s sight. God is love, compassionate and forgiving. Does that represent the God you have been taught about? Too often we humans portray our weak, jealous feelings onto the Divine Entity who created our world, and we expect him/her to respond in a human way.

Fortunately for us, God is more tolerant than we are, and more patient. God to me is a Universal Intelligence who sees the big picture. He sees the beginning from the end and knows all things. God is also part of you and me. As the ultimate expression of love and light God is also expressed in all of creation, including you and me. That means I am an expression of the Divine, and you are too, as is the enemy across the frontier.

No, it is not God who is dead, but the faulty perception we have of God which is dead. God is very much alive, and alive in every human being, animal, fish and plant. Think of that. When one man kills another, he is killing God! Isn’t it easy to understand why God, no matter in which religion he is represented (or misrepresented), implores us to love our brother and sister, our neighbour and even our enemy. In doing so we are expressing the God part of our being.

What do you think? Is the god of your tradition dead? Or is He/She very much alive in all that you think, do or say?

The native Na’vi of the fictional planet, Pandora, are depicted as having a very close bond with Eywa, their mother of nature, and all life. This bond is demonstrated by a physical connection made either through their tails or pony-tails to other animals or to the earth itself. A spirit-tree which produces floating feather-like flowers, is their connection to Eywa. The flowers are attracted to innocence and an open heart. When a connection to Eywa is required the entire village gathers around the tree, tails connected to the earth, and holding each other they chant and connect in united spirit to Eywa. When they make a bond through their pony-tails to other animals these animals become their servants – a personal close bond is formed for life.

Throughout the movie the na’vi’s bond to nature is emphasized and made central to the plot. The Earth scientists also made the discovery that the trees of Pandora where somehow connected to each other, forming a intricate network of some kind of communication.

The story revolves around the “need” for the Earth humans to harvest a precious crystal power source which just happens to be in great quantities under the home-tree of the na’vi. Either the na’vi move or the military force them out.

What does this teach us? First of all there is the very strong message that the Earth humans have destroyed their own Mother, Gaia. Their planet is no longer green and now they proceed to destroy another planet in their hunger for resources. It is a reflection of the rape and destruction of our remaining rain-forests and other natural habitats. The movie, Avatar, gives us a strong reminder that we cannot continue to rape our planet and kill Mother Earth, for in doing so we will bring our own ultimate doom.

A second lesson to be learned from the Avatar movie is the connectedness everything has to everything. Everything is connected. I’ve said it many times and I believe it to be so. Everything is energy and we are energy and on the energy level we are, everything is, connected. You may refer to this energy connection as a spiritual bond. Even quantum science is beginning to prove this connection and the ancient teachings of the alchemists and mystics all speak of an underlying spirit or power which gives all things life and holds all things together. We are all connected to all things alive and inanimate and because of this if we harm anything we also harm ourselves. If we hate someone because of skin colour or creed we are in fact hating ourselves.

The third lesson to be learned from Avatar is the magnetic attraction of innocence and love, a pure heart and a giving soul. Nature is designed to be a giving force to create and support life in all of its abundance. This includes every need and desire of humankind. I believe that the “natural” disasters which we experience frequently are the result of the imbalance of natural energy flows caused either directly or indirectly by us humans, directly through our scavenging the earth and indirectly through our selfish hatred of our own kind – humans.

The underlying force of Nature is Love. Love is never selfish and always wishes the best for the other. This is Nature as it is meant to be. Love is the source of all life. If we humans have not love then we upset the balance of nature. The laws of attraction tells us this is so. Think of evil and evil will come upon you. Think of good and you will experience good. Fear bad things and that fear will upset the natural balance of love and trust and bad things will result. Avatar reminds us that we each have the power for our own good or our own destruction in our our own hands.

There is one other lesson in the Avatar movie which may have gone largely unnoticed. It is the importance of gratitude. When Neytiri kills some wild creatures in order to save Jake she weeps because the animals did not need to die, but they died because of Jake’s carelessness. Later as Jake was trained in the art and ways of the na’vi he also learned to be grateful even for the prey he just killed for food. He very deliberately thanks the animal and releases its spirit to return to Eywa while it’s body stays to become a part of the na’vi.

How often are you grateful for the smallest blessings? Are you aware of your connection to nature, to your car, your money and your neighbour? Are you sensitive to the fact that whatever you give out will return to you, whether that be hate or love, or selfishness or generosity, rudeness or kindness. Have you been grateful for 2009? Stop and think now and give thanks for all the good that your life has received in 2009. And if you only think of bad things give thanks for that too, perhaps you have missed something.

Be blessed and enjoy your connections in 2010.

What is a Relationship?
A relationship is a connection between two human beings, be it a business, family, social or intimate relationship. All relationships comprise of similar characteristics and boundaries. The connection is what determines the kind of relationship and respect for that connection determines its success. Connections are made in business deals, births and marriages, membership or attendance in clubs and organisations and on the emotional and sexual level between two individuals. Problems arise when this connection is not respected and one party’s boundaries are crossed.

The connection is the basis for the relationship. If this can be maintained honestly then the relationship will grow as trust grows. Where there is dishonesty, there is no trust, the connection is broken and the relationship no longer has any grounds for existence. If the relationship is subsequently forced to continue, either because either or both parties do not face the truth of the dishonesty, or because of fear of what others may think, or even because of the fear of not knowing what to do without this relationship, then this relationship becomes a conflict. The relationship has broken down and only conflict can remain when the two insist on playing out a relationship.

What Boundaries are Necessary in a Relationship?
Every individual has his or her private sphere. This is the area where a person is alone with his or her thoughts, their interests and pleasures. A relationship is built on the connection of common interests. No two people are the same, so there is naturally a boundary between the connecting interest and the individual interests. I see three possible scenarios when this boundary is reached:

1. The boundary of individual interests is respected and left alone. There is no attempt to interfere with the other’s personal interests.

2. The boundary is shared for the sake of the other and the interests are enjoyed by both parties.

3. The boundary is ignored and one party attempts to change the other to make them fit more into their realm of interests.

A combination of the first two will lead to a successful relationship. But any attempt at the third brings only disaster to the relationship.

A healthy relationship is always depending on a healthy give and take attitude. Each party seeks the best for the other and never forces anything. Any attempt to control the other immediately breaks the connection forming the relationship. Freedom should be given and each party is free to develop their own interests and personalities.

Why are Relationships Important?
Relationships are important because of our connection with each other. This time I mean another type of connection. All of us are connected on a higher level than is obvious to our physical perceptions. On the understanding that everything is energy, our bodies, the world around us, even our thoughts, and that beyond the physical world which we are familiar with there is another non-physical existence, outside of our perception of time and space. On this other level, we’ll call it energy level or the spiritual level, everything is connected through a field of energy, for all beings are energy. This connection, although not obvious to us here in this life, is still very real in the other realm.

This is why we are drawn to one another (all man-made religious ideas and ideals set aside) because we are a part of one another. There is a sense of completeness when we have a close relationship with another individual, whether this be on a social or intimate basis. Even a successful business partnership can be fulfilling as both parties benefit from the partnership. We are constantly looking for this inner fulfilment. Some try to find satisfaction in religion, enjoy the connections there, but are driven to despair by all the other stuff which make relationships impossible. Others will seek fulfilment in social or cultural groups, finding those who like the same things. But even these relationships are doomed to failure if they are not built on a mutual connection respecting individual boundaries.

Every individual has a purpose. Our relationships work best when this purpose in respected and given freedom to evolve. How far a boundary should be set is up to the mutual agreement of the parties involved. This may be unspoken yet naturally worked out in the love and respect of each other.

Tell me what you think?

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How far should love go? When is loving too much? When is it not justifiable to love more, forgive more?

If someone has harmed you, you have a right to seek justice and see the culprit punished and the wrong righted. But what if you were to forgive the wrongdoer? And what if he does the same again, and again, and again? What if you really do forgive seventy times seven?

Is justice always the best road to take?

Forgiveness releases energy, an energy which goes out to the forgiven and deep into the forgiver. This energy is greater than the energy dissipated by justice and revenge. The energy released by forgiveness is Love. Love is the greatest force in the universe. Nothing can conquer love. Nothing can replace love. Love is over all. Love is beautiful. Love calms. Love inspires. Love forgets harm. Love overcomes evil. Love supersedes justice. Love forgives. Love avoids conflict. Love heals.

What has love done in your life? What peace has been sacrificed when justice has been sought? Can we choose? Dare we choose?

Think about it. Every area of conflict has one basic problem: one or both sides believe themselves to be right and in the right to do harm to the other side. We scold our children when they fight over toys, yet we accept the same adult behaviour which leads to fists, fighting and feuds. Why is it, that after hundreds of years, people persist in hating the other side? Why is it that we insist the other back down before we do? Don’t they see that when no one backs down that conflict will persist and fighting will continue and children will still get killed?

In this world we have those still acting out of a low state of awareness. They are unaware of the universal connection to all humans. They think themselves as separate entities and of their cause as their identity as an individual being belonging to an distinct group. They feel the need to protect this identity and are prepared to kill for it. And here’s the crunch – Not one of them, no matter which side they are on, is thinking their own thoughts and making their own decisions!

Every one of us has grown up with indoctrination. “Don’t do that!” “Do this!” “Don’t trust them!” “They are not nice people.” And so on. We learn as children to mistrust our fellow human beings simply because they were born to different parents who lived on the other side of the fence. So now they are are enemies and all we know is we must fight them to stop their evil from spreading. And that child on the other side is being taught exactly the same thing.

Mr. Taliban, Mr. Ulsterman, Mr. Iranian, Mr. Israeli, Mr. Palasitnian, Mr. Religious, Mr. Colleague, Mr. Neighbour, and you too, isn’t it time in this world of growing global consciousness to stop our childish, petty quarrels and learn to forgive? Isn’t it time to put aside the centuries old conflicts and outdated views and seek to help our neighbours and give them food, rather than bomb them out of existence.

And Mr. USA, isn’t it time you stopped bullying the world and attacking out of fear and mistrust, and started using your might to build schools, factories, food plants and educate the world to provide for his neighbour? Isn’t it time to turn our swords into ploughs, our tanks to tractors, our bombers into carriers of water and grain? Isn’t it time to make this planet a world of peace and prosperity for all?

For God’s sake and the sake of our children, grow up and stop pointing the finger. We’re no more perfect than the one being accused. Here’s why:

We are all one. All of us! Everyone, no one excluded. We are ALL one. We are living in a sea of energy and we are ourselves formed out of energy and we are all connected via energy. Everything I do effects you and the rest of the world and vice versa. Believe me, God, Jesus, Muhammed, Buddha, Krishna, King David and every other religious or political leader that ever lived are looking down on us right now and shaking their heads. They are urging us to remember their most important message: Love your neighbour as yourself – forgive one another – do good to those who abuse you – provide for the poor, the orphans and widows. If I kill another I kill part of myself. If I love another, no matter where he was born or what he believes, then I am healing myself and humanity.

Isn’t it time to wake up and recognise that the human race is unique and a part of something much greater than humanity? This is our testing ground. Will you mess up, or pass into global acceptance and universal love? What do you think? write a comment below.

How do you deal with a conflict situation? Do you insist on your being right, implying of course that the other person is wrong? Do you feel your sense of justice and righteousness is at stake and your view must be defended and spoken out and heard? Here is a suggestion I find very usful when faced with conflict.

I have spent many decades learning from my dealings with other people. A lot of that only began to make sense since I started studying with Bob Proctor in January 2007, which I continue to do. The whole basis of his teaching, and thus mine, is the working of the mind, in particular how thoughts and thought patterns (how we think in automatic) determine how we act and continue to think. Knowing how the mind works prevents me from jumping to conclusions without knowing all the facts. And I know too well how the mind works (but still much to learn) to be upset by accusations or situations that go the “wrong” way.

“Right” and “wrong” are relative terms, and being 28 years married has shown me (after some turbulence) that being right is not important. Therefore it does not interest me who is right, or who is wrong. What interests me is that I rule my own life, create my own circumstances and thus produce the results I want, and in so doing helping as many others as possible to do the same. And this is done by controlling the mind and the thoughts we allow into our mind. That’s why Bob always encourages and reminds us to write down our goals and repeat them often. Repetition is his mantra.

The advice of the masters is this: In a conflict situation step back and become the observer. Watch what is happening. Look at yourself and the other person, see their reactions, listen to their words, watch their thoughts. But remain the observer, and do not judge. Doing this tends to reduce any stress related to the situation, removes any judgment against yourself or the other person. It shows a very different aspect to human relations – that we are more important than our emotions. There is a higher connection between me and the other person, a connection not relying on my emotion or the feelings of the other person. This connection is spiritual, or some prefer to call it energy.

This connection permits the transfer of energy between those connected (which is everyone), thus causing a reciprocal bouncing back of whatever we send out. If I send out hate, hate will return to me. If I send out blame, blame will return to me. If I send out unforgiveness, that too will return to me. If I send out love, that too will return to me. If I send out kindness and understanding, that will return also to me. I once worked with a man who was very bitter because he could not feel any love. I know now that is because he did not give any love out. The Bible speaks of casting your bread upon the waters for it will return to you.

This is why our thoughts and our words are very important and we must learn to guard what goes into our mind, for what goes in comes out.

How does this help you deal with conflict? Leave your comments here.

Rule 1. The Thumb: Take a hike – Get out for a walk – Take a 10 minute or even a 10 second break.
This gives you the chance to calm down or think before you react. It is always better think before you respond, rather than react.

Rule 2. The Pointer: Remember that when you point to accuse someone that 3 fingers are pointing back. Usually when someone accuses, they say a lot about themselves.

Rule 3. Middle Finger: Show no aggression. Avoid harse words. Again it is good to think before speaking.

Rule 4. Ring Finger: Remember the love bond. Respect your relationship, whatever it is, with the person you are in conflict with. Is it really worth it to stress your point of view or insist on you being right?

Rule 5. Little Finger: The pinky – don’t make mountains out of moalhills - Don’t fight over little things.

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